Welcome to the latest slice of potential bread winning, as we aim to pep up your wallets after a Valentine’s Day hammering (if you were lucky) and if you’re single, we’ll aim to get you laid (joke sponsored by Betfair).
We begin our preview at Kenilworth Road with an old-fashioned cup tie between Blue Square braves Luton Town and Millwall ‘no one likes us we don’t care’ FC. The Lions have suffered from more bad publicity than Oscar Pistorius this week and the 12.45 pm kick off is clearly designed to make sure their fans don’t end up legless. When these two met in an infamous cup game in the 80′s, it ended up in a huge riot (this was pre Kaiser Chiefs). I don’t predict a riot this time, however I do predict a shock Luton victory.
Bet 365 offer 11/4 on a victory for The Hatters
, who said romance was dead? Don’t say Reeva Steenkamp.
Following on the FA Cup theme, we head to the Emirates, where Michael Appleton’s Blackburn Rovers take on ‘The Arsenal’. In last year’s league game, Arsenal enjoyed a 7-1 victory, leading to the fans screaming for the sacking of Steve Kean (it was a fairly common occurrence). The Venky’s have been going through managers like KFC go through fake visas, however they seem happy with the current incumbent and Michael Stipe lookalike – Appleton. In the week of the Pope’s resignation, I don’t expect success for the man who shares his name with a couple of All Saints (Nicole and Natalie). The Gunners may rest a few, however their second string will still be too strong for a ragged Rovers outfit. Bearing in mind that they are unbeaten in 34 games against lower league opposition in the FA Cup, the
4/7 that Sky Bet offer on an Arsenal win and over 2.5 goals
looks more generous than Andre Santos’ decision to return to Brazil.
Now, off to the Championship where runaway league leaders Cardiff City take on ‘local rivals’ Bristol City. A game know as the ‘Severnside derby’, perhaps the only derby between two teams in different countries. If Cardiff keep going the way they are, they will get to play a team from their own country next season (Swansea). Brizzle have been slightly rejuvenated of late under the stewardship of the excellent Brian O’Driscoll, however they don’t travel well and with Cardiff’s home record being significantly more impressive than Charlotte Church’s, I only see one outcome here. A victory for the Welshmen will leave them feeling as satisfied as a sheep on Valentine’s Day. Remember Cardiff fans, if you can’t watch the Six Nations clash with Italy because you’re at the football, you can recreate the magic by throwing a ball into the middle of a punch up in a gay bar. I’m going to stick my neck out here (something Craig Bellamy can’t do) and predict a
home victory (1/2 with Football 365)
.
Don’t worry, we know some of you like a European flutter, so we head to Germany for those who you who know your Bratswurst from your Rindswurst. Bayer Leverkusen take on Augsburg at the BayArena, Bayer are co-managed by former Liverpool legend Sami Hyypiä. Joint managers are as fashionable as lederhosen these days, however the ‘Hyypiä/Lewandowski ‘good cop/bad cop schtick has lead Bayer to third place in the Bundesliga, Sami will be hoping they can ‘Finnish’ the season strongly and with sharp shooter Stefan Kiessling banging in the goals, this is a distinct possibility. If you haven’t had the fortune of seeing Kiessling play (you need to upgrade and get ESPN), he looks like a lovechild of Peter Crouch and Iain Dowie, scary stuff. Augsburg sit in the relegation places ; for those of you not familiar with German geography (Miroslav Klose, Lukas Podolski, Sami Khedira etc) it is a Bavarian university town, so just think student sausage fest and you get the picture, a bit like the second week of freshers. Anyway, I digress, Leverkusen will be too strong for the Fuggerstädter (what a nickname).
1/2 is what Sky Bet offer on a Leverkusen victory
and that looks better value than a monetary seminar with Angela Merkel.
Well, I hope you enjoyed this week’s instalment of football speculation, I’m off to wrestle Stephan Lichsteiner before watching my African Cup of Nations highlights DVD, Cheick Tiote sold it to me, I hope it works ok. Don’t let Adrian Chiles spoil your weekend.
By Jamie Ellis
